My Grandfather Story: Random Musings on My Fuzhou Roots & the Fuzhou Foods I Grew Up With

Today is the anniversary of my grandfather's passing. In memory of him, this post was also written in Mandarin Chinese. Click here to read the Chinese version. 今天是我爷爷去世的周年。为了纪念他这篇博文也是用中文写的。点击此处阅读本文的中文版。

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Yé Ye, it's been over 20 years. How are you in Heaven? This Chinese New Year, a conversation reminded me of you and the CNY meals we had together when you were alive. I wanted to commemorate you and share my thoughts with you, so I wrote this post in Chinese to dedicate to you. I apologise, my Chinese has not improved much after so many years, though I did my best and relied heavily on a dictionary and translator, there are sure to be misspellings and mistakes, etc. in this post. So please don't be too disappointed.

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Crochet Fuzhou Taiping noodles with duck eggs, as the Fuzhou saying goes: "Eat duck eggs and talk of peace"; served with misua that is "silky thin as hair, soft yet strong, not mushy in soup", with added rouyan dumplings because in Fuzhou, there is "no feast without yan, no year without yan".
钩针福州太平面，配上两只鸭蛋，所福州人说的"吃鸭蛋讲太平"，和"丝细如发、柔软而韧、入汤不糊"的线面，加上扁肉燕以福州的俗话"无燕不成宴，无燕不成年"。

During Chinese New Year this year, my friend JS saw my IG Story of the pan-fried Fuzhou nian gao at our family CNY lunch. JS told me her grandparents are also Hokchew (Fuzhou people) and wondered if my grandfather was from the same town. JS related that her grandparents also often said they were classified as Hokkien but are actually Hokchew. This sparked memories of my late paternal grandfather, and a reflection on my family's history and heritage. I thought of my grandfather's roots and the Fuzhou dishes we eat with my paternal family during CNY.

My friend's anecdote has some similarities to mine. When my grandfather was alive, he constantly told us that he was "incorrectly classified as Hokkien" when he settled in British Malaya (Singapore), that we are not Hokkien, our ancestors were from Fuzhou and that we are actually Hokchew. Hókciŭ-nè̤ng as Fuzhou people call themselves in Fuzhou dialect. When I was a child, I didn't quite understand the distinction or why my grandfather was so emphatic about it. To me, Hokkien and Hokchew are both from the same Fujian province but are just from different regions and different dialects, isn't it?

At the time, I think I wasn't able to understand because I was young and green; we were also born and lived in very different eras, places and environments, so context was very different. I admit I was also not very interested back then. Now that I'm older and a little more informed, I have a slightly better understanding of the difference my grandfather was highlighting and why. My grandfather was trying to explain 2 important points. First, the differences in the language/dialect and in the ethnographic identities of these 2 groups, being closely linked to region, ancestral home, clan or kinship and such in China. Second, strictly speaking, there is actually no "Hokkien" dialect or dialect group in Fujian per se.

I use the phrase "in China" because I think many modern-day Singaporean Chinese do not place as much emphasis on the concepts of ethnic lineage, regionality, ancestral origins, clan or kinship compared to mainland Chinese and to our early pioneers, i.e. the Chinese community in 19th and early 20th century Singapore. Moreover, the English words "Chinese", "Chinese people", "ethnic Chinese", etc. do not fully convey the differences in cultural or national identification between mainland Chinese people and overseas Chinese (or people of Chinese descent), or the nuances behind the various terms that are used to refer to overseas Chinese, such as huá rén (华人), huá qiáo (华侨), huá yì (华裔), wài jí huá rén (外籍华人), etc. Exploring this point involves delving into the topic of sense of identity or belonging (national and ethnic), which is a complex and nuanced topic. This is particularly so for the overseas Chinese as our identities as ethnic Chinese have also been shaped by indigenous, geopolitical, sociopolitical influences, cultural assimilation and government nation-building policies. (Something I am made more acutely aware of, remembering my grandfather's words.) And so, my brief discussion of the topic in this post is only intended to serve a limited purpose; with my lack in-depth research and study, this post cannot give this topic the justice or discussion it deserves.

I understand that my grandfather was saying that while geographically my paternal ancestry hails from Fujian province, we are neither Minnan/Hoklo people nor "Hokkien" in the Southeast Asian/Nanyang meaning of the word. That our family ancestry came from a different region in Fujian, belong to a related but different ethnic subgroup that speaks a related but different language/dialect, and has slightly different cultural customs, culinary and regional characteristics. (Related as in of Min-Yue and Han Chinese descent; but that's not a topic for this post, as it's another complex topic that requires research and knowledge.)

In saying "Hokkien people", "Hokkien language" in the Southeast Asian/Nanyang parlance, my grandfather was also explaining that strictly speaking, there is actually no dialect or concept of "Hokkien language" in Fujian per se. In China and southern Fujian, they are referred to as Minnan or Hoklo people; while Fuzhou people refer to them as "xià nán xiōng" (下南兄). "下南" literally means "down south"; "兄" brothers, brothers and sisters (兄妹) or brethren (弟兄) or friends (仁兄). So "下南兄" would be like referring to them as "brethren down south".

The term "Hokkien" is a Southeast Asian/Nanyang term, used as a simple way to collectively refer to the Minnan language and by extension, the Chinese from southern Fujian or the Minnan people who immigrated to the region. The term is technically inaccurate. Some are of the view that it was mistakenly used by Western missionaries in the past: "Hok-këèn" as coined by Medhurst (1832 A Dictionary of the Hok-këèn Dialect), referenced in the Peh-ōe-jī, later revised to "Hokkien" by John Macgowan (1869 A Manuel of the Amoy Colloquial); itself derived from "Fujian" (or "Fukien"), the province name.

Fujian is linguistically and culturally highly diverse due to its immigration history and geographical environment. Sources may vary slightly but generally speaking, there are 8 languages/dialects within Fujian itself: Mindong (Eastern Min) in the northeast, Minnan (Southern Min) in the southeast, Puxian in the central coastal area, Minbei (Northern Min) in the northwest, Minzhong (Central Min) in the central and western parts, Hakka (or Shaojiang according to other sources) in the southwest, as well as 2 minorities — Wu in the northernmost part of the northwest and Gan (or Min-Gan) in the western part of the northwest.

Linguistically, Hokkien (or more correctly Quanzhang) and Hokchew/Fuzhou dialect are branches of the same Min language group, descended from proto-Min but developed differently and are not mutually intelligible. Hokchew is also not mutually intelligible to Mandarin and other Chinese dialects, including the other Min languages. Hokkien/Quanzhang is a branch of the Minnan/Southern Min language. It is the most widely spoken branch. Hokkien/Quanzhang is used in Quanzhou, Zhangzhou and Xiamen, and is widely used in Taiwan, Southeast Asia, the US and elsewhere where large numbers of southern Fujian (Minnan) immigrants settled.

A branch of the Mindong/Eastern Min language, Hokchew is the prestige variety (i.e. the "correct" form) of Mindong and its representative. Broadly speaking, it refers to Houguan (侯官), the dialect originating from and spoken in the former Ten Counties of Fuzhou (福州十邑) of the old Fuzhou prefecture. The Fuzhou dialect is largely centred around Fuzhou city and the areas under its jurisdiction. Outside China, it is spoken in the Taiwan, Southeast Asia, the US, etc. where many Fuzhou people settled; in particular, the Matsu Islands, Malaysia's Fuzhou communities of Sitiawan in Perak (dubbed "Little Fuzhou"), Sibu in Sarawak (aka "New Fuzhou"), Sepang in Selangor and Yong Peng in Johor, as well as the Fuzhou enclaves in NYC's Manhattan Chinatown and Brooklyn Chinatown. But compared to Hokkien/Quanzhang, Hokchew is considered an endangered dialect, as there are far fewer speakers and its use (even in China) is declining.

Now about my grandfather. According to my dad, my grandfather was from Fuzhou in eastern Fujian. He said our paternal family was originally from Linsen (林森) and said the family moved to Fuzhou city when the family home's area was redeveloped (or possibly redistributed) by the government. Which specific town or location our ancestral home was, when the family had to move, and such details, my dad didn't know and couldn't provide. I searched a little online (in English and Chinese) for some clarity. My paternal family was originally from Minhou county, a county under the administration of Fuzhou, and was the former Min and Houguan counties of the Ten Counties of Fuzhou (福州十邑) of the old Fuzhou prefecture. Linsen was the county's name between 1943-1950, named after Lin Sen, the Chairman of the Nationalist government during 1931-1943. Beyond that, I will have to go to Fuzhou and ask our relatives there. Most of what I know is hearsay, and I regret not asking my grandfather about these when he was still around.

My grandfather, Third Aunt, Second Aunt, my dad and grandmother, 1950s Singapore | 爷爷、三姑、二姑、爸爸和奶奶，1950年代新加坡

My Second Aunt told me that my paternal great-grandfather was a principal and teacher at a local school, that our ancestors owned some land and many were educators or in some similar role (possibly scholar-gentry, but she wasn't certain). My great-grandfather lived in the tumultuous last days of the late Qing dynasty, and the political conflicts that followed in the early days of China's republican era. My grandfather too lived in a dire time in China. Though Fuzhou was not directly impacted by the 1928-1930 famine, it was also a time of political turmoil and revolution, civil war and war with Japan. My grandfather said very little of his youth but from his brief account, they lived very frugally, largely due to my great-grandfather's thriftiness. According to my grandfather, my great-grandfather's frugal character and kind generosity to others were his well-known traits. My great-grandfather also ensured that my grandfather was rigorously educated such that by the time he was 12 or 13 years old, he was well-versed in the Chinese classics (the Four Books and Five Classics, etc.), the classic Chinese novels, as well as the basics of history, geography, mathematics and science. (This certainly explains part of his criticism of my primary school curricula.)

From what my Second Aunt said, my grandparents met when my grandmother went to China for further studies. My grandmother came from a Peranakan family in British Malaya (Johor Bahru in the unfederated Malay state of Johor). I always thought her family was crazy to permit it, considering the circumstances in China compared to the relative safety of British Malaya. As the story goes, my grand-parents met, fell in love and got married. After World War II, concerned with the ongoing communist revolution and resumption of the civil war, my grandparents decided to emigrate to Southeast Asia (then also called Nanyang). At first they considered settling in Malaysia, where my grandmother's family were, but eventually they decided on Singapore. Not an unusual decision at the time. Since the fall of the Qing dynasty and subsequent unrest, many Chinese emigrated to Southeast Asia in order to build better and stabler lives.

When they left, my grandparents temporarily entrusted their first child (my First Aunt) to the care of my grandfather's siblingss in Fuzhou. She was a newborn barely a year old at the time. They had intended to return for her once they had settled but that became increasingly difficult and dangerous after with the civil war, then the Korean War, clashes in the Taiwan Strait and Southeast Asia, the Vietnam War, as well as political purges during the Cultural Revolution.

Additionally, in the 1950s, many overseas Chinese were also impacted by the Chinese government's policy of non-recognition of dual citizenship. This pushed many overseas Chinese to make a decision. Some chose to remain in British Malaya, some returned to China voluntarily but some were forced to remain as they were denied re-entry into British Malaya by the colonial government. My grandparents remained because they had a young family and stable jobs as teachers in Chinese-medium schools. As for my First Aunt in China, having grown up separated from my grandparents since she was a newborn, immigrating would have been unsettling. Even if she was willing to leave, she was unable to, as travel restrictions were severely restricted and controlled under Communist rule in the 1950s and 1960s.

My grandparents were also fearful of the ongoing political purges and campaigns under the Communist regime. Considering their backgrounds, they and their children (my dad and aunts) would be at risk being discriminated against, persecuted and abused as class enemies and counter-revolutionaries. Moreover, during these political campaigns, Chinese teaching institutions were affected and in chaos, teachers and intellectuals were targeted in struggle sessions. It was also common for returnees from foreign countries to be labelled as "spies" and "secret agents"; many were investigated, illegally imprisoned, brutally tortured and forced to confess.

As best as they could, my grandparents corresponded with the family in Fuzhou, sending over medicines, provisions and money where possible. They corresponded with my First Aunt, following her growth and life through letters and photographs. But at some point, for her survival and safety my First Aunt had to reject them as class enemies. The 1950s political purges and Cultural Revolution was a turbulent and confusing time for my paternal family's history. My dad and aunts know very little of what had happened during this period, so they could only tell me few details. To my Second Aunt's knowledge, the family's lands and properties were confiscated and redistributed; they escaped execution or imprisonment under the Land Reform Movement because their charitable and generous conduct was well-known and people in the area respected and protected them. But I heard that due to their backgrounds, some family members couldn't avoid being denounced as class enemies and counter-revolutionaries under the Five Black Categories or the Stinking Old Ninth. It wasn't until the 1980s when China opened up under Deng Xiaopeng that my grandfather was able to return and meet my First Aunt again and reconcile. My First Aunt also visited Singapore in 1988 or 1989 to meet her siblings, nephews and nieces, and to pay respects to her mother's ashes. Sadly my grandmother passed away from lymphoma in 1979 and never saw my First Aunt in person again. (I was a little emotional writing this part; my heart was filled with sadness and anger.)

My grandfather was a reserved man of few words. He hardly spoke of his life in China during the civil war and World War II, about his past or the family he left in China. Aside from expressing his scathing criticism of the Revolutionary Party (the KMT's predecessor), the Beiyang and Nationalist governments, the CCP and their politics, he did not affiliate himself with any political party in China or political ideology. He did see some merits that each regime brought about but was nonetheless highly critical of the leaders and the violent conflict, and his main lament was that the Chinese people suffered. So it was ironic that at one time, he was accused by a school colleague of being a communist, and was investigated.

My grandfather was clearly proud of his Fuzhou roots. He was also supportive of fellow Fuzhou people in China and abroad, and often followed and talked about their works. Among those he mentioned whom I still remember, the most prominent were Chinese female writer Bing Xin and pioneer generation Nanyang-style artist Yeh Chi Wei. Grandfather spoke of Yeh Chi Wei but I don't know if there's any family relation. I still have a Chinese book on Bing Xin's works that he gave me when I was in primary school.

He often reminded us that we are Hokchew (Hókciŭ-nè̤ng). But he rarely spoke Hókciŭ-uâ at home and didn't teach it to my dad and aunts. He sometimes talked about the Fuzhou foods and traditional customs of his hometown. He did not particularly observe or pass down many of the traditional Fuzhou customs, but every CNY, he and Second Aunt would prepare some classic Fuzhou dishes for the family CNY meals. Our family CNY meals would have Fuzhou nian gao, Fuzhou fishballs (福州魚丸), rouyan (肉燕) dumplings and of course the soul food of Fuzhou: hóng zāo chicken (红糟鸡), a traditional Fuzhou classic of chicken braised with red yeast rice wine (hóng zāo jiǔ, called qinghong in Fuzhou) and the hóng zāo lees, and served with misua (Fuzhou flour vermicelli).

Before CNY every year, my grandfather would visit the Singapore Foochow Association, something that became a kind of personal tradition of his. He would make his rounds, giving his CNY greetings to his fellow Hokchews, former students, friends and acquaintances. He would then make his way to 📍Seow Choon Hua to buy Fuzhou nian gao, Fuzhou fishballs and rouyan for our CNY family gatherings. He went every year until he was in his 80s, when his health and mobility were severely compromised and he couldn't walk anymore. Now my dad continues to do so, and he gives me some every CNY, which I include at reunion dinner with my husband and in-laws (who are Hokkien and Teochew).

Crochet rouyan dumpling | 钩针扁肉燕

The CNY Eve reunion dinner steamboat would always have Fuzhou fishballs and rouyan dumplings. An interesting point: both are meat wrapped in meat! Fuzhou fishballs are minced pork wrapped in fish paste; rouyan are dumplings made with pounded lean pork wrappers called yanpi (燕皮) stuffed with a fish and pork leg filling. I'm reminded of another traditional meat-wrapped-meat dumpling that I love eating: her kiao, Teochew fish dumplings with wrappers made of fish paste and tapioca flour. Not commonplace but they're more easily available and better known in Singapore than Fuzhou rouyan.

Rouyan is one of my favourite dumplings but they are hard to come by in Singapore. Prior to receiving them as CNY gifts, my in laws didn't know of them. The process of making the wrappers is laborious and time-consuming as traditionally, pork hind is pounded to a paste with a wooden mallet, then mixed with sweet potato flour and rolled into paper-thin sheets. When researching for this post, I learnt that Fuzhou people have a saying, "无燕不成宴, 无燕不成年", which means there is "no feast without yan, no year without yan." So, traditionally, Fuzhou people have rouyan during festivals, birthdays, weddings, farewell gatherings and even funerals. I guess this is why my grandfather always said we had to have rouyan for CNY.

The first day of CNY always started with pan-fried Fuzhou nian gao and Nonya chap chye, the latter as a respectful reference to my grandmother's heritage. As Fuzhou nian gao includes tapioca flour, taro and peanuts, it is quite different from the Guangdong/Cantonese nian gao. The latter is more commonly eaten in Singapore. I learnt that Fuzhou people traditionally eat Taiping noodles or Taiping yan on the first day. However, our family lunch would instead be a fragrant bowl of hóng zāo chicken. There were some years when the hóng zāo chicken was especially fragrant and delicious. My grandfather always said it was because the qinghong (hóng zāo wine) and hóng zāo were from a good brewer in Fuzhou. He sometimes received qinghong wine and hóng zāo from his home county Minhou, which is known for qinghong. I think my grandfather received them when he visited the Foochow Association or his former students, friends and acquaintances. I remember a few times, he also received some that was home brewed in Fuzhou by friends or relatives. (Yes, it can be home brewed!) My Second Aunt said she tried brewing it but was unsuccessful as it is challenging.

This CNY's Fuzhou nian gao | 今年农历新年的福州红糖年糕

The main event was the second day of CNY, the lunch with relatives on my paternal side, that is, when my aunts return to their niáng jiā (娘家). My married aunts, my cousins, grandfather's godson Uncle Chen and their immediate families would visit. Everyone would have lunch together. While the menu changed a little each year, there would always be dishes from our Fuzhou and Nonya roots. Besides Fuzhou nian gao, there would be more hóng zāo chicken and Fuzhou fishball soup — the fishballs would be served in a seafood-based clear broth, and our family likes to include Chinese cabbage and rouyan. There would also be more Nonya chap chye and other Nonya dishes that pay homage to my grandmother, like hee peow soup, babi pongteh, kueh pie tee (aka Nonya top hats), or Nonya popiah (as mentioned, itself of Hokkien/Teochew origins). I vaguely remember the rare appearance of stir-fried white rice cake (白粿); this is a Fuzhou dish of white rice cake sticks stir fried with light stock, Chinese cabbage, Chinese chives, shiitake mushroom and pork or seafood, also common in Ningde, and similar to stir-fried rice cakes in Ningbo, Zhejiang. I learnt that it's also a kind of nian gao but is not the same as the Fuzhou white sugar nian gao, another kind of nian gao also traditionally eaten in Fuzhou on CNY. Sadly we don't eat this white sugar nian gao here and it seems to only be available home-made.

But our CNY dining table would also be like rojak, which draws from different ethnic culinary influences. We would start with lohei, or the prosperity toss in English, with the yusheng (a Singaporean/Malaysian creation, of Nanyang Cantonese influence). The dining table would typically include a Cantonese-style cold dish platter (charsiu, crispy pork belly, century egg, jellyfish salad, spice braised beef), sometimes Shanghai drunken chicken (a Jiangnan cold dish), and Hokkien dishes like soy braised duck, tau eu bah or kong bak pau and such. Dessert, if there was any, was the usual Fuzhou nian gao alongside something simple like Nonya bubur cha cha or the odd, occasional Western style dessert. And of course the plethora of CNY goodies, be it Nonya kueh, ang ku kueh, pineapple tarts, kueh bangkit, love letters, lapis legit, etc....

However, aside from these classic Fuzhou dishes, our family didn't observe many traditional Fuzhou customs. For example, kneading mi shi rice balls or brewing qinghong during Dongzhi; offering bō bō guǒ (菠菠粿, aka Fuzhou qingtuan) during Qingming; eating Taiping noodles or Taiping yan on festive occasions and birthdays; gifting and eating Fuzhou lǐ bǐng (福州礼饼), a kind of Fuzhou mooncake pastry, during the Mid-Autumn Festival, as gifts for betrothals, baby showers and birthdays; eating Fuzhou spring rolls during CNY; sending lanterns, eating Fuzhou yuanxiao and observing the "eat 3 rice cakes (guo), drink qinghong" tradition on the last day of CNY; making aojiu porridge on Aojiu Festival and so on. My dad and aunts' generation, as well as my generation, also don't know much of these customs. I vaguely remember that for a time, at least until I was around 10 years old, my family did observe the "eat three rice cakes, drink qinghong" tradition. We used to eat the 3 rice cakes (kueh here) during CNY: Fuzhou nian gao, the Fuzhou turnip cake (which Fuzhou people call cài tóu guǒ 菜头粿) and taro cake (yù guǒ 芋粿) my Fourth Aunt prepared, while drinking qinghong was replaced with eating the hóng zāo chicken that my Second Aunt cooked. Some traditional foods were substituted (some may say "supplanted") by their Southeast Asian derivations, like the spring rolls with popiah which derived from Hokkien lumpia and Teochew spring roll.

Although many of these traditional Fuzhou customs got lost after my grandparents immigrated and during my dad's generation, I think my grandfather kept and passed down some of the classic Fuzhou dishes in the best way he could given the circumstances. We shouldn't forget that it is very easy to get information and buy ingredients from all over the world now, but this wasn't the case 15-20 years ago, let alone my grandfather's time!

I have wondered if the reason my grandfather had scaled back his approach in passing on these customs was because he wanted my dad and aunts to grow up wholly Singaporean. Or perhaps he tried but my dad and aunts were not interested or couldn't observe them all. I think the influences of my grandmother's own Peranakan heritage, local customs, Singapore's geopolitical and socio-political circumstances of the time, the lack of availability of the traditional Fuzhou foods, and such factors were also major reasons. Maybe while my grandfather hoped to one day return to his homeland, he may have thought his children, being born and raised in Singapore, would go on their own different paths. What his thoughts were then, I have no way of knowing.

As mentioned above, the issue of Chinese identity among Singaporean Chinese is complex, shaped over time by indigenous and Western influences, cultural hybridisation, the geopolitical and sociopolitical circumstances of postwar Singapore, including national policies and social engineering, etc. Post-war Singapore was transitioning towards self-governance and focused on nation-building. The political situation was unstable, and communism-related conflicts were taking place in Southeast Asia. Concerns about the potential communist threat caused tensions between governments and ethnic Chinese suspected of communist sympathies. The Chinese government policies on citizenship in the 1950s also affected many overseas Chinese in Southeast Asia. In Singapore, political conflict between some radical UMNO politicians and the PAP, as well as the instigation of overseas spies, disrupted the harmony between the Malays and Chinese in Singapore, leading to social unrest and triggering racial riots.

Following Singapore's independence, there was a strong government focus on building a common national identity. The intentional construction of a unified Singaporean Chinese identity through national policies (social engineering) further affected the sense of identity and cultural identification of Chinese in Singapore. National policies in the 1960s and 1970s aimed at building a unified national identity, the adoption of English as the national lingua franca, etc. contributed to the declining influence of Chinese clan associations and Chinese-medium schools. The bilingual education policy under which Mandarin was taught as the mother tongue of ethnic Chinese in Singapore, the promotion of Mandarin as the lingua franca for ethnic Chinese and restrictions on the use of dialect through national campaigns such as the 1979 Speak Mandarin Campaign, introduction of civics education and standardised curricula further emphasised a Singaporean national identity. That is not to criticise these policies; they were effective in creating a sense of belonging and nationhood that brought Singaporeans together, and also facilitated harmony and communication across Singapore's different ethnic communities. But at a cost. As, along with the additional global influences from the West, Japan, Korea, etc., my parents' and my generation became increasingly disconnected from our ancestral roots and heritage. Of course this doesn't necessarily hold true for all Singaporean Chinese, but I believe it is for a majority. Looking back, I can now better understand my grandfather's perspective when he used to shake his head and critique: "What do they teach in school these days?"

I would go so far as to say that my sense of identity as ethnic Chinese is likely to be very different from my grandfather's. Born 60 years after him and raised in an independent, sovereign Singapore, my era was a time when the government had fully implemented these national policies. Even my sense of ethnic identity has been influenced by indigenous factors, such as my paternal and maternal grandmothers' Peranakan roots, local history and culture, cuisine, etc. As such, I identify first as Singaporean, as ethnic Chinese second. then as Hokchew (Hókciŭ-nè̤ng) third.

Thinking back on all this now, I think I may have taken the Fuzhou foods of my childhood for granted. As above, I grew up eating the few Fuzhou classics mentioned. These were staples for our family New Years so I thought they were fairly commonplace. Like I wrote about in my nian gao amigurumi post, it was only when I was older that I realised some of the CNY dishes our family customarily ate were a little different from other families. Especially the nian gao; my spouse's family eats the Guangdong/Cantonese-style nian gao which I'm still not used to as I find it too sweet and sticky.

I sometimes feel I sleepwalked through those moments with my grandfather and regret not trying harder to understand him, to learn more about his life story, or to take a more active interest in our family roots. While looking up information and writing this, I keep thinking about how much my grandfather must have missed his hometown, the places and the foods of his childhood. Fuzhou food is already uncommon in Singapore, and is becoming even less common today. Moreover, compared to Hokkien/Quanzhang, the Fuzhou dialect is now considered an endangered dialect. There are even fewer speakers and its use is declining, even in China and the few places that have sizeable Fuzhou communities (e.g. Sibu, Sitiawan, Yong Peng in Malaysia, Taiwan, the United States, etc.). With Mandarin having become widespread in China, even less Fuzhou people, especially in urban areas, are able to communicate fluently in the Fuzhou dialect now. However, in recent years, there has been a resurgence of worldwide interest in the younger generation of Chinese descent who wish to rediscover their roots, as well as a national dialect preservation movement in China. But what impact this would have remains to be seen. If my grandfather were still alive, I wonder what views he would have about it.

我爷爷的故事：随想我的福州根源，我们吃的福州菜

爷爷，已经20多年了。您在天好吗？今年的农历新年有一段交谈让我想起了我们和您在世时一起吃的新年饭菜。想纪念您也和您分享我的感想就用中文写了这篇博文来献给您。对不起，多年过了但我的中文还是没有很大的进步，虽然我尽力而为和大量依赖了字典和翻译字典，但这篇博文里一定有错别字、用错字词等等。请您不要太失望。

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今年农历新年期间，朋友 JS 在我的 IG 故事看到了我们家过年午餐上吃的福州年糕。JS 告诉我她的祖父母也是福州人，想知道我的祖父是否来自同样城镇。JS 说她的祖父母常告诉她他们被归类为福建人 (Hokkien)，但其实是福州人。这让我想起了我已故的爷爷，也让我开始思考我的家族历史和传统。我想起了爷爷的根源，以及爸爸和姑姑们在新年期间一起吃的福州菜。

朋友的回忆和我的有些相似。爷爷在世时经常告诉我们当他移民到英属马来亚 (新加坡) 时被错地归类为福建人 (Hokkien)，说："我们不是福建人 (Hokkien)。祖先来自福州，我们其实是福州人。福州话自称 Hókciŭ-nè̤ng。" 我小时候不太明白这个区别，也不明白为什么爷爷如此强调这一点。因为当时对我来说毕竟福建人和福州人都是来自福建省，只是不同地区和方言而已，不是吗？

我想当时因为我年轻不懂事，不能完全明白爷爷说的话；而且爷爷和我出生生长在截然不同的时代、地方和环境，因此背景也大不相同。我承认我当时为这点也不太感兴趣。如今长大了，见识也广了一点，现在比较能理解爷爷强调的区别以及其原因。爷爷是要说明两个重要点。第一，语言/方言和民系认同的分别；语言/方言与民系、地域、籍贯、氏族或宗族血缘关系等等在中国有着固有的联系。第二，正确来说在中国福建省实际上是没有"福建话"这概念和方言。

我用"在中国"这句是因为我认为，与中国大陆人、19世纪和20世纪初新加坡的华人社区 (新加坡的早期先驱) 相比，许多现代的新加坡华人并不那么重视民系、地域、祖源籍贯、氏族、宗族等等这些概念和联系。此外 (尤其在这篇文的英文版中)，英文 "Chinese"、"Chinese people"、"ethnic Chinese" 等这句不能完全体现中国人 (中国大陆华人) 和华侨华人 (华裔/外籍华人) 之间的文化和国族认同的差别，也未能充分体现用于指代海外华人的词语 (例"华人"、"华侨"、"华裔"、"外籍华人"等) 的细微差别。探讨这一点涉及对国族认同或归属感的深入话题，一个复杂且有微妙的议题。这一点对于华侨/华裔/外籍华人来说尤其如此，因为我们作为华人的身份认同也受到本土、当地历史、地缘政治、社会政治、文化同化以及政府建国政策的影响。(回想起了爷爷的话我更深刻地意识到了这点。) 我在这篇博文中对这个话题的简要探讨仅供参考；我缺乏深入的研究和知识所以在本文中不能公正地对待这个话题并进行应有的讨论。

现在明白爷爷说的是虽然父系家族是 (从地理上讲) 来自福建省，但既不是闽南人，也不是东南亚/南洋以俗称的"福建人 (Hokkien)"。父系家族祖先来自福建不同的地域，属于相关但不同的民系/族群，讲相关但不同的语言/方言，各自的文化习俗、料理和地域特征有些不同。(说"相关"因为是闽越人与汉人的后裔；但这不是本文的主题，因是另一个需要研究和知识的复杂议题。) 说起东南亚/南洋以俗称的"福建人" (Hokkien people)、"福建话" (Hokkien language)，爷爷也说明在中国福建省实际上是没有"福建话"这概念和方言或这民系。在中国和福建省南部 (闽南) 内称闽南人或福佬人，福州人称闽南人为"下南兄"。其英文意思相当于 "brethren down south" 或 "southern brethren"。

"福建话"这句是东南亚/南洋以闽南语的简化统称，并由此延伸至移居东南亚的福建省南部华人/闽南人和他们的后裔。"福建话"这称法不准确。甚至有些认为曾被过去西方传教士误称："Hok-këèn" 由麦都思所创 (1832《福建方言字典》)，后来在白话字引用，然后由约翰·麦嘉温 (另译麦高温、麦嘉湖温、麦高文) 的 1869《厦门方言口语手册》被改为 "Hokkien"；其词源来自福建省名 (也拼写为 "Fukien")。

福建是个语言文化习俗多元化的地域，这来自于福建的移民历史和地理环境地形造。资料略有些小差异但一般来说福建省内有8个语言/方言：东北部的闽东语、东南部的闽南语、中部沿海的莆仙语、西北的闽北语、中西部的闽中语、西南部的客家话 (或根据别的资料邵将语)，以及西北部最北端的一小块吴语和西北部西端的小块赣语区 (或根据别的资料闽赣)。

从语言学上来说，福建话 (准确说泉漳) 和福州语同属闽语，都源于原始闽语，但发展方式不同，两语之间相互无法理解。福州话也与普通话和其他汉语方言，包括其他闽语方言之间相互无法理解。福建话 (泉漳) 作为闽南语分支。闽南语中使用人数最多的闽南语分支。通行于闽南地区的泉州、漳州、厦门；在台湾、东南亚、美国等大量福建南部闽南民系聚居的地区广泛使用。

福州话是闽东语分枝，作为闽东语的标准音及代表方言。广义的福州话泛指在旧福州府的福州十邑 (县) 内的侯官片诸方言；以福州市为中心，覆盖福州市区。中国以外，在台湾、东南亚、美国等有福州民系的移民的地区使用。尤其是台湾海峡的马祖列岛，马来西亚的福州人社区霹雳州的实兆远 (小福州之称)、砂拉越州的诗巫 (新福州之称)、雪兰莪州的雪邦和柔佛州的永平，以及纽约曼哈顿华埠的小福州和布鲁克林华埠的小福州。

现在说到了我爷爷本身的故事。据爸爸说爷爷是来自福州市。父系家族老家原本在林森，老家的地区由政府进行城镇重建 (也可能是重新分配) 时家族搬去福州市。父系家族老家和祖籍在哪里、哪个镇或地区、家族何时搬走、这其他信息详情，爸爸不知道也不能说明。我在网上找了一下 (英语和华语)。父系家族原本来自福州市所辖的闽侯县，是旧制福州府福州十邑的闽县和侯官县一部分。"林森"是在1943年至1950年间闽侯县的名，当时以1932年至1943年担任国民政府主席一职林森命名。但我若想知道除此之外就需要去福州问那里的亲戚。我所知道的大部分都是听说的，后悔在爷爷在世时没有问他本人这些。

二姑告诉我曾祖父 (爷爷的父亲) 是当地一所学校的校长和老师，祖先拥有一些地，许多是教育工作者或类似职位 (可能是绅士，但她不能肯定)。曾祖父生活在清朝末期动荡的末世以及中华民国初期的政治动荡时期。爷爷也在中国艰难的时期生活；虽然福州没有直接受到民国十八年年馑很大的影响，但当时也是正值政治动荡、内战和抗日战争的时期。爷爷自己很少谈论他年轻的时候但从他简短叙述，曾祖父他们生活非常俭用，大部分是因为我曾祖父的节俭性格。据爷爷说这节俭性格和他仗义疏财严慈的人格是我曾祖父众所周知的特征。爷爷也说我曾祖父确保他得到了严格和十足的教育；爷爷十二十三岁时就精通中国古籍 (四书五经等)、四大名著，以及历史、地理学、数学和科学的基础知识。(这确实解释了我爷爷对我的小学课程的批评的一部分。)

据二姑说爷爷奶奶是在奶奶去中国留学的时候认识的。奶奶来自英属马来亚 (当时马来属邦柔佛的新山市) 的一个峇峇娘惹 (也称土生华人) 家族。我个人一直认为如果想到当时中国的情况与英属马来亚的安全相比，奶奶的家人愿意允许奶奶去中国留学是疯狂之举。据说，爷爷奶奶相遇、相爱、结婚。第二次世界大战后，担心当时持续的共产主义革命和内战的再次爆发，爷爷奶奶决定移民到东南亚 (当时也称南洋)。起初他们想到搬去马来西亚，奶奶家人居住的地方，但最终选择移民到新加坡。当时这并不是个异常的决定；自从清朝衰退灭亡，随后的动乱以来许多中国人为了寻求远离战乱建立更好更稳定的生活而移民到东南亚。

他们离开时把他们第一个孩子 (我的大姑)，暂时托付给了爷爷福州的弟妹照顾。当时还不满 1岁的新生女儿。二姑说爷爷奶奶原本计划安全定居后把大姑带过来，但随着国共内战再起以及随后的朝鲜战争、台海和东南亚冲突、越南战争和文化大革命时的政治清洗，情况变得越危险出行变得越困难。此外1950年代时中国政府不认双重国籍政策也影响了许多华侨华人。这政策迫使许多华侨华人做出决定。有的选择留在英属马来亚，而选择永久回归的华侨华人有的是自愿但也有的是由于被殖民政府拒绝再次入境英属马来亚而迫不得已永久回归。爷爷奶奶为了年幼的孩子们和华校教师稳定的职业留在新加坡。至于我的在中国的大姑，她从新生时就和爷爷奶奶分离福州叔叔姑姑们照顾，移民到东南亚肯定会让她感到不安。即使他愿意他也不能离开；在1950年代1960年代的共产党管治下旅行受到严格限制和控制。

爷爷奶奶也害怕共产党管治下当时进行的政治清洗和运动。想到爷爷奶奶的背景，他们和孩子 (爸爸和姑姑们) 有可能在共产党管治下被当作阶级敌人和反动学术权威而受到歧视、迫害和虐待。此外清队运动的期间，中国教学机构遭到波及混乱，教师和知识分子成为批斗的攻击目标。加之海归人员被打成"间谍"或"特务"是普遍现象，有许多被立案审查，遭到非法监禁、残酷折磨、刑讯逼供。

爷爷奶奶尽力与在福州的家人保持通信，尽可能寄送家人药品，生活用品或他们缺的东西。也与大姑时常通信，通过信件和照片跟随她成长成人和生活。但有一段时期为了保存生命和安全，她不得不排斥他们为阶级敌人。政治清洗和文化大革命对我父系家来说是动荡混乱的时期。爸爸和姑姑们对这时期发生的事知道的少，所以他们也只能告诉我很少的细节。据我二姑所知福州家人的土地和不少财产被没收重新分配；他们在土地改革运动中逃脱了死刑和监禁因为他们的慈善和慷慨的行为周知，得到了周围人民的尊敬和保护。但听说有些家人因为背景不能避免被批斗为"黑五类"或所谓的"臭老九"等等下的阶级敌人和反动学术权威。直到1980年代初邓小平领导下的改革开放，爷爷才终于能和我大姑团聚与和解。大姑也在1988或1989年回访来新加坡与她的弟妹们、侄子女和外甥子女见面，也拜见她母亲的骨灰。很遗憾的是因为在1979年因淋巴瘤过世，奶奶之从离开中国就没有再见到大姑。(写这部分时我的情绪有点激动，心就悲哀激愤沸腾。)

爷爷是一位矜持沉默寡言的人。他从未提起在中国内战和二战期间的生活，也很少谈起他年轻的过去以及留在福州的亲戚家人。除了直言不讳的表达他对中华革命党 (国民党前身)、北洋政府、国民党政府、中国共产党及其政治的严厉批评外，他没有参与中国任何政党或政治意识形态。他确实认知了这些政权各有带来的优点，但仍然对领导人和暴力冲突提出了严厉的批评。他最悲哀的是祖国人民在这些革命中遭受苦难。所以讽刺意味的是他曾经he被一位同事指控为共产主义者，并受到调查。

当然爷爷为自己的福州民系和根源感到自豪。爷爷也支持祖国内和海外的福州同胞。他经常关注并谈论海内外福州人的作品。在他提到的那些我至今仍记得的人物中最著名的是中国女作家冰心和南洋风 (南洋画派?) 新加坡第1代艺术先驱艺术家叶之威。爷爷提到过叶之威先生但我不知道他们之间是否是亲属或其他关系。与作家冰心我还保留着小学时爷爷送给我的一本中文书《冰心名作欣赏》。

他时常提醒说我们是福州人。但可惜他在家很少说福州话也没有教爸爸姑姑们福州话。爷爷也有时会谈起家乡的小吃和美食和传统习俗。爷爷没有特意保留遵守或传承大部分的传统民间习俗，可是每年新年他和二姑定会准备几道经典福州菜和大家过年。过新年时餐桌上定会有红糖年糕 (福州方言叫作糖粿)、福州魚丸、肉燕，也一定少不过福州的灵魂食物：红糟鸡，用红糟和红糟酒 (福州人称为青红酒) 炖制的鸡配上线面的一道福州经典菜。

每年新年前爷爷都会去新加坡福州会馆送礼问好；这成了他在世时的一项个人习俗。他会四处向他的福州同乡、旧学生以及熟人朋友们送礼问好。爷爷然后会去萧钟华 (📍Seow Choon Hua) 买福州年糕、福州魚丸和肉燕，用于我们家过年期间吃的菜。直到他80多岁左右健康和行动能力严重受损无法行走之前，爷爷每年都会去。现在爸爸也继续从那里买，每年春节会送我一些；我在和丈夫、岳父岳母家团圆饭里加上 (岳父是闽南人，岳母是潮汕人)。

除夕团圆饭的火锅里总会有福州鱼丸和肉燕。有趣的一点：这两种福州小吃是肉包肉的概念！福州鱼丸是用鱼丸酱包猪肉馅的一种鱼丸；肉燕是用猪精肉红薯粉捣碎做成的燕皮包鱼肉和猪腿肉的肉馅。我想起了喜欢吃的另一个传统肉包肉的饺子：潮汕鱼皮胶，皮由鱼肉将和木薯粉制成的。不常见但在新加坡比福州肉燕更广为人知，也更容易买得到。扁肉燕是我最喜欢吃的饺子之一，但在新加坡不多不容易买得到。在春节送礼收到肉燕之前，我的岳父岳母没听过也没吃过肉燕。制作燕皮的过程费力又费时因为传统做法是将猪瘦肉用木棒捶打成肉馅加上红薯粉制成薄如纸的片状。在找资料写这篇博文时我学到了福州人有句俗话："无燕不成宴，无燕不成年"；意思是说宴会、过年或成年不能少过肉燕。所以福州人过年、过节、过生日、婚礼、送别、甚至丧事都要有肉燕。我看这就是为什么爷爷老是说过年一定要有肉燕。

新年第一天总会以油煎福州红糖年糕和娘惹杂菜开始；杂菜是致敬奶奶的娘惹根源。福州年糕 (红糖年糕) 的配料包括木薯粉、芋和花生，与在新加坡常见的广东年糕有些不同。最近发现到了福州人新年其中的传统习俗是吃太平面或太平燕。但我父系家是第一天在午餐吃一碗香喷喷的红糟鸡。有些年不知为什么红糟鸡格外鲜美芬芳。爷爷总说是因为红糟酒 (青红酒) 和红糟是来之福州一家好酿酒家。爷爷偶尔从老家乡闽侯县收到红糟酒和红糟，闽侯县以红糟酒周知著名。我猜是在爷爷去福州会馆、旧学生以及熟人朋友们送礼问好的时候收到的。爷爷也偶尔收到福州亲戚朋友们自家酿制的红糟酒和红糟。(红糟酒是可以自家酿造！) 记得我二姑说她曾经尝试在家酿造，但因为酿造红糟酒很有挑战性，她没有成功。

新年第二天的主要活动是我的姑姑们回娘家的时候。结了婚的姑姑们、堂兄弟姐妹们、爷爷的教子陈叔和他们的直系亲属也会来拜访，大家共进午餐。虽然菜单每年会些改变但总会有几道福州和娘惹菜。福州年糕以外会有再多红糟鸡和福州鱼丸汤；鱼丸配上海鲜熬制清汤底，父系家喜欢加上大白菜和肉燕。还会再有娘惹杂菜以及其他致敬奶奶根源的娘惹菜，例如鱼鳔汤、豆酱焖猪肉、娘惹小金杯或薄饼 (如上所说是源自福建润饼和潮汕春饼)。我依稀记得罕见的炒白粿出现过。这是用清汤、大白菜、蒜苗、香菇、五花肉或腊肠和白粿干炒的一道福州菜；也在福建省宁德常见、类似于浙江省宁波。我在找资料时发现到这白粿也是一种年糕，但与福州白糖年糕不同；白糖年糕也是福州人在春节时传统上吃的另一种年糕。可惜我们在新加坡没有见和吃过这种白糖年糕；好像在新加坡只有在家制作才能吃上。

但我们过年餐桌上也就像新马罗惹一样，受到了不同民族食材与调理方法的影响。先开始是捞鱼生，鱼生是新马独特创作，源自南洋粤菜的影响。餐桌上时常会有粤式凉盘 (叉烧、脆皮五花肉、皮蛋、凉拌海蜇、五香酱牛肉)，有时有上海醉鸡 (江南凉菜) 和福建菜如五香卤鸭、酱油肉或红烧五香扣肉包等等。若有甜品，就是油煎福州年糕与当地甜品比如摩摩喳喳，偶尔会有西式甜品。当然也会有琳琅满目的新年糕饼：娘惹糕、红龟粿、黄梨挞、薯粉饼 (也称椰香饼)、南洋鸡蛋卷、印尼千层糕等等...

除了这些经典福州菜之外，我们家没有遵守大部分的福州传统习俗。比如冬至时搓米时、造青红酒，清明时献上菠菠粿 (福州青团)、节日生日吃太平面或太平燕，中秋节、订婚迎婴和生日的期间赠送和食用礼饼 (福州的一种月饼)，春节吃春饼 (也称福州春卷)，元宵节送花灯、吃肉馅元宵和老福州"吃三粿、喝青红"的习俗，以及拗九节煮拗九粥等等。爸爸姑姑们和我这两代也不大知道大部分的这些习俗。我隐约记得有一段时期，直到我大约10岁的时候，我们是有遵守这"吃三粿、喝青红"的习俗。在新年时会吃三粿：福州红糖年糕、还有我四姑准备的菜头粿和芋粿，而喝青红酒这部分被改成吃我二姑煮的红糟鸡。有一些传统福州菜也已被东南亚风味的菜代替 (有些人可能会说是"取代")，比如源自福建润饼和潮汕春饼的新马薄饼。

虽然在爷爷奶奶移民后以及我爸爸的年代失去了不少传统福州习俗，但对我来看我觉得爷爷在当时的情况下尽其所能地保留和传承了下来一些福州经典菜。我们应该不要忘记现在从世界各地得到资料和购买食品材料等等时非常容易的事，但是15～20年前情况并非如此；更不用说我爷爷的时代！

我有时想，不知爷爷是否因为希望爸爸和姑姑们在新加坡的成长过程中能认同自己是新加坡本地人而选择不传承所有的习俗。或也可能是爷爷有尝试过但我爸爸和姑姑们不关注，没兴趣或无法遵守每个。我想奶奶的娘惹根源和本地文化习俗的影响、当时的地缘政治、新加坡的社会政治环境、以及在新加坡不容易得到传统福州菜和食品等等因素也是主要原因。也许爷爷本人怀着回归祖国的希望可是他认识自己的孩子未来的道路并非如此。但爷爷当时的想法，我无法知道只能猜测。

如前面所提到的，新加坡华人的华人身份认同是个复杂的问题；是随着时代的推移，本地和西方的影响、文化融合、二战后的地缘政治、当地的社会政治环境以及国家政策、社会工程等等的影响。二战后的新加坡正向自治过渡中以及专注于国家建设；当时政局不稳定，东南亚地区与共产主义相关的冲突。对共产主义潜在威胁的担忧，东南亚地区的各国政府与怀疑同情共产主义的华人之间的关系紧张。1950年代中国政府国籍政策也影响了新加坡和马来西亚的华侨华人。具体说在新加坡，马来西亚巫统内部的一些激进的政客与新加坡人民行动党之间的政治冲突，以及海外特务的挑拨离间，扰乱了新加坡马来人与华人之间的和睦，导致社会动荡也引发了种族骚乱。

新加坡独立后，新加坡政府非常重视建立共同的国族认同。以通过国家社会工程政策有意建构统一的新加坡华族文化和身份认同也对新加坡华人的身份认同感和文化认同有额外的影响。1960～1970年代的政府政策也注重建立统一国族认同团结人民，采用英语作为国家通用语等等，导致宗乡会馆和华校的影响力下降。政府推行全国双语教育政策以华语作为新加坡华人的母语进行教学，通过全国运动等等 (例如1979年讲华语运动) 限制方言的使用和提倡华语作为新加坡华族的通用语，以及推行公民教育、统一的课程标准进一步强调国家身份认同。我说这些并不是要批评这些政策；它们有效的创造了国族认同和归属感，使新加坡人团结也促进了新加坡不同民族之间的和合共生和交流。但这也有代价。随着来自西方、日本、韩国等全球影响不断增加，我父母和我这代与祖先的根源和文化遗产的联系越来越疏远。当然这并不一定指于所有的新加坡华人，但我相信对大多数来说是如此。想起这些我现在比较理解爷爷的观点，他过去有时摇头批判说："现在学校在教什么呀?"

我甚至可以说我作为华人的身份认同感与爷爷很不同。(我说的"华人"意思不是中华人民而是华裔或华侨的身份。) 我出生在爷爷之后60年，在独立主权的新加坡出生长大，我成长的时期也正是政府全面推行这些国家政策的时代。我的民族认同感也深受到了本地因素的影响例如奶奶和外婆的娘惹根源文化遗产、新加坡文化历史、料理等等。因此对我来说，我首先认同自己为新加坡人，其次才是华人，然后才为福州人 (Hókciŭ-nè̤ng)。

现在回想起这些，我可能把童年时享受的福州菜视为理所当然多年没有珍惜。就与这博文所说的过新年饭，我就这样从小吃到了上面提到的那些福州经典菜。它们是我父系家新年的主食，所以我以为他们是相当常见的菜。在我钩针年糕博文中提过，直到我长大尤其结婚后才感悟到我在家习惯吃的新年菜与别的家庭有些不同。尤其年糕；丈夫家吃的年糕是广东年糕，我到现在还不大习惯，觉得味道太甜腻，口感太粘稠。

现在有时感觉自己在梦游中度过了与爷爷一起的那些时刻，后悔当时没有更加努力去了解他，他的人生故事，对我们福州家族根源显示更积极的兴趣。在找资料和写这篇博文时，我一直在想爷爷在世时定想念他的家乡、童年的家和食物。福州菜在新加坡已经不常见了，如今更是少见。此外与闽南话/泉漳片相比福州话现在被认为是濒临灭绝的现状。即使在中国和那几些拥有大量福州人社区的地方 (例如美国、台湾、马来西亚的诗巫、实兆远、永平等) 能使用福州话的人也越来越少，使用率也在下降。在中国随着普通话的普及，越来越少的福州人尤其是在城市地区能熟练使用福州话进行交流。但最近这几年世界各地对希望寻根问祖的年轻一代的华裔/华侨人的兴趣再次高涨；中国也掀起了一场全国性的方言保护运动。这会产生何种的持久影响有待观察。如果爷爷还在世不知道他对些会有何看法。